A Parapros is a figure of speech in which the latter part of a sentence or phrase is surprising or unexpected in a way that causes the reader or listener to reframe or reinterpret the first part. It is frequently used for humorous or dramatic effect, sometimes producing an anticlimax. For this reason, it is extremely popular among comedians and satirists.
• I asked God for a bike, but I know God doesn’t work that way. So I stole a bike and asked for forgiveness.
• Do not argue with an idiot. He will drag you down to his level and beat you with experience.
• I want to die peacefully in my sleep, like my grandfather. Not screaming and yelling like the passengers in his car.
• Going to church doesn’t make you a Christian any more than standing in a garage makes you a car.
• The last thing I want to do is hurt you. But it’s still on the list.
• If I agreed with you we’d both be wrong.
• We never really grow up, we only learn how to act in public.
• Knowledge is knowing a tomato is a fruit; Wisdom is not putting it in a fruit salad.
• How is it one careless match can start a forest fire, but it takes a whole box to start a campfire?
• Some people are like Slinkys … not really good for anything, but you can’t hel p smiling when you see one tumble down the stairs.
• I didn’t say it was your fault, I said I was blaming you.
• Women will never be equal to men until they can walk down the street with a bald head and a beer gut, and still think they are sexy.
• There’s a fine line between cuddling and holding someone down so they can’t get away.
• I used to be indecisive. Now I’m not sure.
• I always take life with a grain of salt, plus a slice of lemon and a shot of tequila.
• When tempted to fight fire with fire, remember that the Fire Department usually uses water.
• You’re never too old to learn something stupid.